If only it came in solid gold...
I can't say enough good things about this toilet. Truly, the listing does it no justice. The listing doesn't even mention that this unit includes the Bedazzler feature. When you activate Bedazzler mode, the water stream of any bidet mode you have selected will be infused with tiny diamonds. Many users have reported reluctance to use this mode for fear that the diamonds will hurt. But that's not the case. This toilet only accepts diamonds mined from the deepest, scariest parts of Africa where each tiny diamond, approximately the size of a grain of sand, is painstakingly hand sculpted by a workforce comprised entirely of children under the age of 12 to a perfectly smooth teardrop shape. You can rest easy that there are no defects because any errors, no matter how minor, are punishable by death! That's the peace of mind you get when you spend $20,000 on a toilet. Enough of that boring stuff, how does it feel? It's really difficult to describe. The best analogy I can think of is Pop Rocks. Imagine a stream of wet Pop Rocks being fired at high pressure right up your backside. Let me tell you, toilet paper isn't the only thing you won't need in your house anymore; you won't need coffee either! It's the snap-crackling way to start your day that only the privileged elite will ever experience. There's just no substitute for quality. Even though the children who craft these diamonds go blind by age 13 from having to focus their eyes on these tiny diamonds for 18 hours per day, 7 days per week, they do so with the knowledge that they have created a product of unmatched quality that their wealthy customers will get a brief moment of excitement from and then promptly flush down the toilet. And this is just one of hundreds of lesser-known "Easter egg" features of this amazing toilet. Buy one today with your AmEx Black! Read more
