The one and only. Accept no substitutes!
Years ago I received a secondhand Keurig from my local "everything free" group. It was the original model, a big sucker. Definitely more firepower than I needed but so powerful and dominant I could not resist it. That machine became vital to my ADHD morning routine. No more spilling stuff everywhere, no more folded-over coffee filter and cup full of grounds and water. No more being late because I had to babysit my coffee maker. I could just pop the pod in, press a button, and go. My life was improved. That machine was an absolute workhorse but sadly after constant use it began shutting itself off and not restarting. It was time to move on. I initially purchased a knock-off k-cup machine. It promised that it would make both iced and hot coffee for $20 less. It wove a web of lies that ensnared me. I won't get into what was wrong with it, that is for another review. What I will say is that I returned it promptly and ordered this brand new fancy baby Keurig. This machine, which I will call K-Pod Demon Hunter, heats quickly -- like almost immediately. It brews a perfect cup every time. It makes pleasant noises while it works that let me know it's happy. I am also happy. We are happy together, like the song. The only thing I do not like about this machine is the color. It was on sale because it's a "holiday color" but it is not attractive. It is ugly. It's the color you see in winter coats on sale. Your chain-smoking great aunt who is obsessed with true crime and criticizes your life choices but may leave you some money when she dies has a jacket in this color. It's neither red nor purple nor magenta. It has a touch of brown but it's not rust. Nobody likes this color. Nobody has ever liked this color. It's not a color that will become retro at any point. This color is neither pleasing to the eye nor soothing to the spirit. But I'm not perfect either and K-pod Demon Hunter accepts me as I am. I am writing this review in a different room so it can't hear me and feel hurt. Perhaps over time I will learn to love this color because I love the machine in which it is swathed. Unlikely, but they say that love can work miracles. Reader, I wish you all the best in your coffee journey. I hope that you find love like I did with K-Pod Demon Hunter. Heed my words and do not be tempted by off-brand substitutes and their beautiful lies. They won't understand you. They won't respect you. They won't be there for you and your time of need like K-Pod Demon Hunter is for me. I want you to have what I have. Your happiness is important to me. Read more
